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Continuing on with this teen parenting story, I said to my friend “Don’t you think it is inappropriate for this parent to be doing this to his child”? He gave some answer about artistic freedom and how it was beautiful. Not wanting to start an argument I just basically told him that he had no idea of the effect taking those pictures of the child might have on that child and neither had the parent. He admitted it was the first time he had ever thought of it that way.

So here is the issue in teen parenting. It is not okay anymore to not know what your child or teen is doing at all times. We, as parents, have roughly eighteen years to mold our children into ethical, moral, and responsible adults who will be a benefit and a contributor in our home and society. The first four years are basically  for just loving them because they are too small. That leaves fourteen years to train, lead and teach them.

In teen parenting, the parent must be a leader. The parent must take the leadership role away from the teachers, away from their friends, away from the internet. For the teachers reading this, this is not an insult to you. It is a benefit to you. You have been saddled with the lazy parent syndrome. A teacher’s job is to teach subject matters that empower kids to think and learn. You are not substitute parents. In fact, if you read the data 40% of teachers quit the profession after 2 years. I suspect a lot of that reason is because you have been frustrated with having to be surrogate parents rather than educators of the next generation.

For parents, who think that teen parenting is a liaise faire event, I can tell you teen parenting is a do all you can to lead and guide event, and hope you did enough so your teens will succeed in life event.

In teen parenting, your child needs a simplified environment with guidance about the key issues. The key issues are doing well in school, being honest, respectful, and helpful. Our job is to teach them these values in an incredibly loving, guided, responsible fashion.

Please read teen parenting and what is okay part 3.

Good luck,

Dr. Bocknek

Dr. Robert Bocknek is the problem solving expert for marriage, parents and families